Fair Minded New Zealanders

Dear Pamela,

It all began shortly after Marcia left our New Zealand Shores. The first I noticed was shrouded behind a major world championship athletics meet. It would seem that, in the ladies 3000 metre final the Ethiopian favourite was 200 metres off the pace and in great pain with only four laps to go. Anyway, she made a remarkable recovery to win the race. Marcia explained that it was the biggest story of the games. Of course, we in New Zealand knew nothing of this because our commentators and newspapers were directing our attentions towards New Zealand’s own Margaret Smith who came fourth. If I remember they even interviewed her.

Well, Marcia is coming home shortly and I have noticed other little quirks. She has stopped referring to children as ‘Our New Zealand Children’ in her child care pamphlets. She simply refers to children generically. In fact, she rarely uses the term New Zealand at all.

Her unbiassed attitudes are disturbing and I am really worried that she may embarrass me by pointing out excellence in the endeavours of other nations in front of my friends. Her impartiality could prove to be nauseating.

What can I do?

Yours, very worried,

Mary Potts

Dear Mary,

I know of only one solution. Please can you send me her full name, her passport number and the date and time of her flight into this country. I have some very influential friends within the confines of our immigration department and I am sure that her arrival need not concern us at all.

Yours,

PAM